Back-to-school season: How to lower stress and build community at school

Back-to-school season: How to lower stress and build community at school

If the Sunday scaries were a month, it would have to be August: the start of back-to-school season. Saying goodbye to summer in preparation for a new school year can trigger a flood of difficult emotions, whether that’s anxiety, sadness, excitement, or even fear.

You might feel a sense of dread about adjusting to a more rigid, less flexible routine; or you might feel anxious about looming expenses, shorter days, or a combination of all the above. Even if you’re anticipating the new school year, the good kind of stress (known as eustress) can feel uncomfortable.

If you or your teen is feeling overwhelmed with back-to-school stress, know that these emotions are normal and valid. This guide from Talkspace provides tools to make this transition easier. It also highlights the important role community plays in the process and shares new ways to build your community if you’re looking to expand your circle.

Why is Back-to-School Season So Stressful?

The back-to-school season can be unnerving for students, parents, and families alike. It’s important to acknowledge that back-to-school stress is far from an isolated experience. Some factors that contribute to back-to-school stress include:

• Seasonal shifts: Experiencing the end-of-summer blues or a more severe form like seasonal affective disorder (SAD) could explain feelings of exhaustion, depression, or a loss of interest in the things that normally bring joy.
• End-of-summer guilt: Maybe you had a lengthy bucket list of all the things you wanted to do this summer, but didn’t even cross off half of the list. The stress you’re feeling might be a result of grief over the passage of time you can’t get back.
• Financial concerns: As a parent, the costs of sending your child back to school can add up quickly. From buying uniforms to school supplies and course materials, let alone tuition if your teen is off to college, it’s understandable to feel as if your budget is stretched thin.
• Juggling more responsibilities: As next-level classes offer a more demanding workload, teens may feel swamped at the thought of a schedule packed with classes, homework, and extracurricular activities. That’s a stark contrast to the laid-back summer months, when they had infinite free time. Your work schedule might also pick up at this time, which can be stressful when trying to balance your teen’s return to school.
• Social challenges: While teens may generally feel excited to reconnect with friends, those who feel like outsiders or are entering new schools with different classmates can have a harder time adjusting. Diving back into an environment where they’re exposed to their peers and teachers daily can also be overstimulating after a long break away from them.

How Community Helps at School

Teachers, administrators, school nurses, and guidance counselors all play a critical part in helping teens feel mentally and emotionally supported throughout the year. When students feel welcomed and connected to their school community, their mental health improves, they do well academically, and are less likely to engage in high-risk behaviors like drug use and violence, according to a 2018 review of 82 studies. Fostering a sense of belonging at school can aid in the back-to-school transition; this all starts with prioritizing community.

How to Build Community in School

Starting the school year can feel scary without a strong support system. Encourage your teen to step outside of their comfort zone one day at a time. Here are some ideas.

Leaning into interests

From drama club to the school newspaper, there’s a group that appeals to most students nowadays. Teens should actively seek out extracurricular clubs and sports they’re interested in and feel supported in participating. After-school activities are a great way to form meaningful friendships based on shared interests and offer a creative outlet they can pore over after their studies.

If the school doesn’t offer a club for a topic they’re interested in, they may be able to start one of their own if there’s enough interest from classmates and support from a faculty member.

Branching out of your core group

Community doesn’t have to be limited to the same three friends you chat with every day. Encourage your teen to grab lunch with someone outside of their usual circle this year. Connecting with people you wouldn’t normally connect with can help tap into other circles and broaden ways of thinking. Not to mention, having friends outside your immediate group can provide a “social safety” net in case the group dynamic shifts.

Taking advantage of office hours

Office hours are a low-pressure way to visit teachers after class to clarify concepts taught in class, ask questions about homework assignments, or just to say hello. Students can also take advantage of this time to connect with their teacher one-on-one outside the hurried nature of a lesson plan. Teachers are there to ultimately support their students' growth, even in areas unrelated to their schoolwork.

Teens should feel empowered to build a relationship with a teacher they can trust to talk about personal issues with classmates, share good news, or ask for advice on matters they may or may not feel comfortable discussing with parents. Research highlighted by the American Psychological Association shows that teachers who foster positive relationships with their students support their adjustment to school, social skill development, and academic performance and engagement.

Embracing weak ties

Weak ties are the micro-level connections that enrich our lives without us realizing it, and they can easily be found at school. The concept, popularized in the 1970s by Stanford sociologist Mark Granovetter, Ph.D., suggests that even the most seemingly minor everyday interactions can do more for us than we think. That’s not to say the conversations with strong ties (aka close friends) aren’t impactful, but making acquaintances at school who don’t progress to anything more isn't necessarily a bad thing. In fact, far from it.

According to one 2014 study, students experience greater happiness and a stronger sense of belonging on days when they interact with more classmates than usual, including their weak ties. Each day, teens can make it a point to say hello to their school janitor, strike up a conversation with the lunch aide, or a classmate they only run into in the hallways, for both parties’ well-being.

How Therapy Helps in the Back-to-School Season

If you or your teen needs a little extra support this back-to-school season, a therapist can help ease the transition. Therapy can help students and their families build a support network to get through the season's stress. Online therapy generally provides options to message a therapist through a platform or chat with them over video.

According to research published in the journal Frontiers Public Health, online therapy shows significant promise in expanding access to and improving care for youth. Particularly in underserved populations that struggle to access in-person therapy, teletherapy also reduces the barriers and logistics involved with seeking support as well as the stigma associated with it.

Here are just a few ways a therapist can help teens this back-to-school season:

• Managing first-day/week anxiety and stress with new coping strategies
• Helping strengthen time management skills between studies and extracurriculars
• Guiding them through grounding exercises in times of overwhelm
• Lending an ear to listen to vent sessions without judgment
• Mediating issues concerning other classmates
• Providing a safe space to address bullying or harassment issues
• Offering an unbiased outside perspective that close friends or family members can’t

This story was produced by Talkspace and reviewed and distributed by Stacker.